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Dorkus where the f*ck have you been?

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dorkus_molorkus

Active Member
Mod note: Disclaimer....... those who are easily offended should avoid this thread. This is the one place on the forum where questionable content is given some leeway and there may be material that you feel is offensive or vulgar. Consider yourself warned and proceed with caution.

Where o where do I start? Pull up a chair, get some funions, pack a bowl, get comfy & listen the fuck up.

Lets get this premise out of the way first off.
Most people are cunts. period.

So in a galaxy far far away, in a forum thats not this one almost 2 years ago. I was in a thread that might have sounded like
' fuck off ' , ' fuck me ' ' shit me' or ' shit you' I dont fucking remember.

but, there i was in this thread ranting like a muthafucker on how a scumbag associate (my builder)had been charged with child rape offences of his wifes daughters from a previous marriage and was telling me his wife was going to dob me in for my small grow. Which was code from him for me to keep my mouth shut because he had made limited confessions to me about his offending.

In theory I had a scumbag pedo who desperately needed me to shut up, his wife that I didnt know at all, but was making threats against me thru him for no ascertainable reason. There was also, the issue with the police. Did I want them seeing me as a friend or a foe?

and of course there are the victims. you know I was told to stay out of it? that it was best that I mind my own business not get involved. WTF? Now i dont really know the victims, but who cares? the truth is the truth and those girls deserve to have their day. From where i sit, I had no choice, there was only one way to act, one thing to do.

Fuck that shit. If im going down then im going on my own terms.
So, I called the cops, made a statement & also told them the sort of terrible fuckwit this guy is.

They didnt believe me.

I then summoned the devil from the depths of my soul. I rang this muthafucker cho-mo (prison slang for child molester. in oz we call em rockspiders) & told him the cops had been to my house & I had made a statement. I also mentioned very strongly, if I ever saw a copper here I would be a very unhappy camper.

All sorted I figured. Happy coppers, happy wife of victims, unhappy pedo but fuck him he weighs 120lbs wringing wet & he thinks im rather crazy. Sure he is a vindictive cunt, and I know there is zero chance i was getting out of this unscathed.

None the less, I pushed on I had my small grow for nearly 7 years in total i think, I wasnt giving up now.

I had enough for myself & I helped out 2 people, both medicinal patients. Sure i didnt give it away, but it was the best & most consistent product that these people could find.

I saw them 4 times per year, once everytime I cropped out. I thought these 2 people were my friends. In fact I thought quite a few people were my friends. One of them knew I was growing, the other did not.

So, with this court case hanging over my head and the fear that I would have my door kicked in at any moment.

I lost my sense of humor. This is about the time i stopped writing very much. I really struggled to write anything at all let alone funny.


Then this site came along, and I was here for a bit. I still struggled to write anything for a number of reasons, the political climate was a fair bit of it, but the waiting for the inevitable fucked with my head a bit and really set off my anxiety.

13 months this vindictive pedo piece of shit waited, On Feb 14th 2018, ten nsw coppers from a special drug task force showed up at my front door with dogs, 4 assorted cars, a fucken 30ft van FFS! they blocked off the street & then proceeded to tear my house and my life to pieces.

An anonymous crime stoppers call they said.

Well let me tell you I utterly shit my pants. I was a blubbering, spluttering mess. However, I managed to keep my internal shit together.

Me falling into to heap, losing my shit & sobbing like a child really paid off in this instance.
I highly recommend it.

So, I convinced the coppers that I was a medicinal user for depression & anxiety. They marched 7 plants out the front to parade in front of the neighbours like conquering heroes. They weighed up 275 grams of cannabis in 3 separate bags. They put it to me that the three bags were for sale, I replied that they were 3 different strains.

Said Detective looked at me like i was mental. Strains? he said, I said yep. thats big bang, and thats really good for sleep anxiety, pain etc, but heavy as fuck. this is super skunk good for daytime use and this one is great white shark, another great allrounder. On close inspection they were very clearly 3 different types of pot.

Detective looked suitably impressed. We then get to the fridge, silicone container with BHO in it. fuck.

whats this they ask? IDK I say, but whatever it is its mine lol. (in the end i think i told them it was the goop from inside my solo stem lol)

where did you get these seeds from? a guy at the pub i say. (herbiesseeds.com.uk)

who? says Plod

a fella named Bob who drives a troopy (landcruiser troop carrier)

WAS IT A WHITE TROOPY? (like they knew exactly who i was talking about)

me: yep ( I dont know a bob, or anyone who drives a troopy. to any random bobs out there that drive troopys, sorry bro I hope you have your shit clean cause they are fucking on to you)

They tell me they are going to put me in a paddy wagon and take me 'downtown' lol. I beg them not to.

and i mean fucking beg. so much so, they let me change my clothes & put me in a car instead not in handcuffs.

They offered me an interview, and of course against all legal advice. I did.
I told them i was growing for my own use, for my personal medicinal needs.
they tried to trick me by asking why grow inside and not outside. (trying for an enhanced cultivation charge)
I replied people would see if i grew outside. they asked, so are the plants bigger or better being grown inside?

Nope, theres no substitute for gods sunlight i say. fuck you plod. fuckers were pretending they were my friend.

overall they did me ok. I got charged with possession and cultivation and my statement written by them was quite sympathetic . they put me in a cell by myself instead of a 3ftx3ftx 7ft perspex dog box (out of care for my anxiety) which was nice.

About 4 hrs later after being finger printed and mug shotted, they let me out.
Guess who is waiting outside? laughing at me?
The pedo who used to brag that he sends the drug squad thru peoples lives he doesnt like.

I just couldnt believe it. but there he was, and he knew exactly what was going on.
Somehow, i didnt beat him to death then & there. I just fucked off to go see my wife to tell her whats happened.

Then the next day I had to confront my neighbours. It was one of the hardest things Ive ever had to do, I was so ashamed.
Im surrounded by old people, very conservative. I must say they were all very supportive and quite shocked at the spectacle over 7 plants. It was a nice feeling.

There were a number of things to be thankful for. believe or not.

They were kind enough to leave me 1.5oz of nugs that somehow they left on the floor. They also left me 7grams of hash and about 4 grams of kief.

They didnt find my scales. they didnt find cash, both of which were very purposely hidden. they didnt find unprescribed s8 medications even though they were laying around. (not anymore lol)

(now i didnt have any spare pot to hide, but if i did I would hide it in the roof & tell em its full of ratsack up there & they wont put the dog up there.) anywhere else it will be found. They went thru pasta, rice, flour, my freezer, fucking everything.

If they had of come 2 weeks earlier, I would have been nicked with 1.5lbs + , (espec if I still had the waste) if they had of come 2 weeks later I would have had 16 plants instead of 7. I was just about to take clones.

I had to attend rehab, called the merit program. I got piss tested monthly, I paid for an expensive psychological report, I got a psychiatrist and had multiple sessions per week with a psychologist for months.
Oh and i got me a lawyer. I have very mixed feelings about my lawyer, but he did me right in the end so I shant complain.

Being raided was one of the most traumatic things that has ever happened to me. Even though i knew it was coming one day, I was prepared, I had mentally rehearsed that day for years and years and it went really, really well over all. Nevertheless I was traumatised big time, i totally fell apart.

yeah i know, dont do the crime, blah, blah fucking blah (go eat a bag of dicks)

I found being in the system now very daunting.

I make contact with the scumbags now ex wife (that supposedly hates me), turns out it was mostly bullshit. she is a very nice lady & we have become quite good friends. She has been terrorised by him for months on end. He is on bail for multiple charges of rape of minors and he runs around making her life hell. twice he has vandalised her car, he has had her investigated at her work & he gets to weaponised the coppers against me.

god, pedo's own father purposely harassed my wife at her work, just to upset her.

I spent months in and out of court this year. I was a mess for months. My wife didnt go to work for the first 3 weeks, my son dropped everything to drive 4 hours and take days off work to be there directly after the raid.

I really found out who had my back.
I had ' friends' of over a decade tell me that my anxiety & depression was caused by my cannabis use. Those people have not spoken to me since, nor enquired to my welfare if speaking to my wife at any point since.
Another is my wifes brother. the one i liked, nup couldnt give a fuck and has never asked how it all went.

the other brother, the one who has been nothing but a dick his whole life, couldnt do enough for us. he was always asking how I was and to keep my chin up.

Then there were the two people I helped out with their meds 4 times a year. One, the one that didnt know I was growing. I then tell her, OMG! she burst into tears and thanks me for taking all that risk for so long to ensure she had her meds for all these years. she then rang every lawyer in town on my behalf & told me to ring ' this guy' and he promises to get you off. (lol he was shit)

The other guy, (who knew I was growing) well the other guy is a little paranoid to put it politely. So, knowing as such, I arranged to send a covert surreptitious message to reach him letting him know whats happened, but its ok everyone is safe.

That was February 15th this year. this person has stayed in my house, slept on a bed provided by me, has visited mutiple times, has met my wife.
NOT ONE FUCKING WORD.

I had been dealing with you for years. and you cant even reach out to see how i went?
I always knew you were a selfish shit, hiding behind your bullshit illness.

How is it the cunts that tout how smart they are to everyone, are always clueless wankers?

Anyhoo, now i have wiped the shit off my shoe please allow me to continue.

4 months later I went to court. pleaded guilty, had drs reports, pee tests, I had shit coming out of the wazzoo.

I was convicted for possession and cultivation. I got a $500 fine +$328 courts costs for possession of 275 grams & a 12 mth good behaviour bond for cultivating 7 plants in a purpose built space sporting a sophisticated set up.

Fuck i had even made arrangements to have the fine & court costs waived due to a program utilising mental health professionals.

fuck that shit not fucking good enough. A criminal conviction? bullshit i say.

So I bundled up my massive balls & I appealed the severity of the sentence , went up a court to the district court 2 months later. (about 3 weeks ago)

I won, I still pleaded guilty, but the fine was quashed and so was the recording of the convictions which of course was my goal. so no conviction recorded & a 9 mth good behaviour bond.
I can still travel overseas, work for the govt & molest the mannequins in the katies window.
It cost $5-6k, but it was worth it.


I still have to front court to witness against the pedo at some point in the near future, and hopefully he goes away for a couple of years. Its been a very tough & trying few years and its not over yet.

However, not only have I come out the other side. Im bigger, better, stronger & smarter than i was before.

I have left people shaking their heads in wonder at how I have managed to pull off this stunning victory from the jaws of defeat. (my own lawyer from day one said it would be a miracle to have no conviction recorded) I dont know really, a lot of luck, a lot of belief in the good guys, a shitload of faith too.

But i do know I wouldnt have been standing tall here at the end if it wasnt for those who carried me in the beginning.
So, in this order.
I wish to thank my loving wife who never once told me to snap out of it or get my shit together.
To the mother I may never get to meet on this plane. @momofthegoons you have always been so good to me. I can never repay the love & support you have always given me.

to my friend Glenn, if my dog hadnt of adopted you all those years ago the judge would have thrown the book at me.
Your beautiful character reference saved my ass.

and theres annie frigate, god you are one crazy bitch. hang in there hon, it will get better im sure.


Then there is the whole nsw medicinal cannabis scheme. Im sitting here as I write this, waiting for my first delivery of medicinal cannabis. (TNT express do your thing!)

I dont know how i did it, but i did it. :aaaaa::weed::weed::weed:
I now hold a nsw prescription for medicinal cannabis!:worship2::worship2::worship2::weed::weed::weed:

but thats another post.

Lolz fuck you pedo fuck.
 
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LesPlenty

Well-Known Member
Shit, you haven't had a good year, have you. I am glad to hear the worst is behind you and that you can at least get access to your meds again. I talked to my Doc about indica v sativa and hybrids as he did not have a clue, no use asking him for a script. My old Doctor (now retired) suggested MJ many years ago over the anti-inflammatory drugs that were eating the lining of my stomach as I had been on them so long.
Medical MJ avail in Australia, when did this happen?
Hope the skinny nark builder prick gets what's owed to him.
Did your other friend manage to get the medical MJ too? The one worth worrying about that is.
 

Stevenski

Enter the Dragon
Staff member
Welcome back mate :biggrin:. That whole situation is a bit cunts fucked & you know my feelings on rock spiders. A nice full kettle over the head would be a great start to prison life methinks.

I can still travel overseas, work for the govt & molest the mannequins in the katies window.
That is the dorkus we need here. Every thought of stepping it up & hitting on the DJ's mannequins or what about pantsing a Kmart one? Slipping the elastic waist $6 trackie daks over the non existent hips :dog:



Looks like we are due for a spike in mod related matters @momofthegoons :lol:
 

momofthegoons

Vapor Accessory Addict
Staff member
Welcome home @dorkus_molorkus my dear friend.... :hug:

This has been such a difficult couple years for you and your family. This was a true test of your character and strength and you have come out of it a better person. A few more speed bumps to go past but all in all you have your life back and a solid future to look forward to. I couldn't be happier for you....
 

felvapes

Well-Known Member
A lot I could say on this
Maybe not though and not public


How did you get the weed script?.....
What part of east coast you on? (as much as can divulge obvz)

I know one other who has a script but it costs so much that they still have to go to the illegal sources

BTW F%$# rock spiders
 
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Baron23

Well-Known Member
Most people are cunts. period.
Too true, mate. Too true

Somehow, i didnt beat him to death then & there.
There is always time to revisit that decision.

Hopefully, AUS prisoners are like those in the USA....they fucking HATE child molesters and rapist and make their life living hell. One can only hope, right?
 

momofthegoons

Vapor Accessory Addict
Staff member
I'm going to just interject here that I usually despise the word 'cunt.' I realize that it's a word used often in Australia... but here it's a really derogatory term and being a woman.. well... I don't like it.

However... in this instance... this motherfucking pedo deserves it. He's ruined so many lives. So in this thread I will let it be. Let's just not make a habit of using it elsewhere please?
 

felvapes

Well-Known Member
Too true, mate. Too true



There is always time to revisit that decision.

Hopefully, AUS prisoners are like those in the USA....they fucking HATE child molesters and rapist and make their life living hell. One can only hope, right?
Most ppl are cunts alright....

As for rock spiders - yer ppl here generally hate them - same in gaol
Problem is they usually get put in their own special unit we call the boneyard (for rockys and snitches) or in isolation - so they don't get punished
If they did put them in general population they would not last very long here in gaol.....


Sorry for the offense to you with the c word @momofthegoons

But yer in Aus it is used widely

I also believe it to be a good and powerful word that gives life to many meanings
It is universal - powerful - like a woman....
It is both positive and negative - here esp
and women use the word


You can call me a good c, a mad c, check this c here he's deadly c

Or all the negative terms - like this pedo cunt


But you can only use dick negative

You cant say look at this dick hes a mad dick, this dick here is one of the best dicks I know.....

It doesn't work the same - they all negative




Also - just to be a pedantic c%$#


cunt is actually the better word to use speaking english as it is anatomically correct for the meaning

Vagina however originally meant scabbard or sheath for sword

And guess what the slang word they used to describe their penis was back then?

Yup sword/saber

So they were being more derogatory by using vagina than c...


I do not mean to tell you what to be offended by though at all and respect what you saying


Just describing 1 - how people speak in this country and 2 - the actual origins of the words in english

https://www.dartmouth.edu/~humananatomy/resources/etymology/Pelvis.htm


https://qz.com/1045607/the-most-offensive-curse-word-in-english-has-powerful-feminist-origins/


http://msmagazine.com/blog/2012/11/27/c-is-for-cunt/
 
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arb

Semi shaved ape
I have to ask..........why did you continue to associate with and not take action when he confessed to you earlier that he was indeed a pedophile.
You say he was concerned enough about what he said to threaten you for said confessions,kind of odd there eh.
 

dorkus_molorkus

Active Member
I have to ask..........why did you continue to associate with and not take action when he confessed to you earlier that he was indeed a pedophile.
You say he was concerned enough about what he said to threaten you for said confessions,kind of odd there eh.

his confession was very limited in a very complicated and murky situation where the only info available was coming from him & he is a highly manipulative person, it was his behaviour that gave him away. the timeline was less that a week, and I spoke to him 2 times in that week. (edit 3 times)

I wasnt associating with him so much as working out wtf was going on, once I worked out it was very serious I couldnt get to the cops fast enough.

I shouldnt have to explain myself in minutiae either, saying my behaviour is kind of odd & implying I dragged my feet on such an important issue is rude.

you werent there? eh?


BTW- its my right an as Australian to use the word 'cunt' as often as humanly possible any attempt at censorship of my god given right may see one labelled as such.
 

dorkus_molorkus

Active Member
That is the dorkus we need here. Every thought of stepping it up & hitting on the DJ's mannequins or what about pantsing a Kmart one? Slipping the elastic waist $6 trackie daks over the non existent hips

Pantsing a Kmart one? I dont know what sort of tawdy shit you think im into, but I draw the line at them Kmart slags. they are all named Shazza. In fact on the odd occasion that i am in Kmart I like to walk up to any of the shazzas there and hand draw a bluebird just above the left boob.

However if I really wanna fly my freak flag I go to Millers (thats the store where older ladies shop) and molest their mannequins, as im doing it im pretending its the asshole little kid down the roads grandma.
I get some odd looks when im bending over a mannequin in a nice blouse & a sensible skirt, whilst im spanking her ass and asking if she going to tell little timmy how she got plowed at Millers and that she loved it.

Moral of the story,
wash anything bought from Millers first. I know that rule is for everywhere, but especially from Millers (I love that place)

Btw- the mannequin at Millers that we know as Timmys grandma, shes a demon in the sack & has had some sort of Brazilian. (I dont know how many that is, but i think its a lot) so as I was saying, Timmys grandma is a slut & is DTF.
 

LesPlenty

Well-Known Member
I am glad I live in Tasmania and not Australia as the C word is only used occasionally and never in the presence of a lady around here (unless everyone is naked at the time) hell, we don't even listen to Rodney Rude or Kevin Wilson if ladies are about.:twocents:
That being said, all rock spiders are.......you know what!
 

momofthegoons

Vapor Accessory Addict
Staff member
Pantsing a Kmart one? I dont know what sort of tawdy shit you think im into, but I draw the line at them Kmart slags. they are all named Shazza. In fact on the odd occasion that i am in Kmart I like to walk up to any of the shazzas there and hand draw a bluebird just above the left boob.

However if I really wanna fly my freak flag I go to Millers (thats the store where older ladies shop) and molest their mannequins, as im doing it im pretending its the asshole little kid down the roads grandma.
I get some odd looks when im bending over a mannequin in a nice blouse & a sensible skirt, whilst im spanking her ass and asking if she going to tell little timmy how she got plowed at Millers and that she loved it.

Moral of the story,
wash anything bought from Millers first. I know that rule is for everywhere, but especially from Millers (I love that place)

Btw- the mannequin at Millers that we know as Timmys grandma, shes a demon in the sack & has had some sort of Brazilian. (I dont know how many that is, but i think its a lot) so as I was saying, Timmys grandma is a slut & is DTF.

giphy-14.gif


It has occurred to me that most may not understand what's going on... and may need a bit of a history lesson.

In a land far, far away... in a time long ago... there was a Parkinson's thread. Oh... what thread! It was a thread where the misfits seem to land... a bawdy and sometimes vulgar place.... A place the moderators feared and loathed. And being the only female moderator on the forum, I decided I would show those other mods who was tough; who had the balls of the group. I could handle this! And in I went......

Some mornings.... dear god.... I would come on with my coffee and see what had gone on the night before...

giphy-14.gif


And would have to go through and sanitize a bit....... okay... a lot.

But..... next thing I knew... I had become a changed woman. I had met my people.

giphy-15.gif


It was understood on the forum that this was a 'no man's land' and that what went on in the Parkinson's thread stayed in the Parkinson's thread. If you didn't like the content you just moseyed along. The rules were looser for that thread.... and dorkus.... well dorkus was dubbed the 'village idiot savant;' a title he has carried proudly since.

Some might say it was the seed that started the idea of the asylum..... and when I started this forum, it was with fond memories of that time and place. And the hope that perhaps we might find that camaraderie and frivolity in some small way again. I made some good friends in that thread. And I think there's always room for one place (thread) on a forum where things can be a little looser. So I hereby dub this thread 'The Village' and crown dorkus with his moniker once again.

So beware folk... it might get dicey in here. And if you are easily offended... this wont be the thread for you.

giphy-14.gif


P.S.

284894_1144820135551970_7503581605365096564_n.jpg
 
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